Ever feel like you’re not measuring up? Just not doing your part in relationships? Other priorities? Not sure that you’re actually prioritizing what matters most to you?
You might tell yourself any of the following:
You and me both. It doesn’t have to be this way, though!
I’m not an expert in living the perfect life (um, look to Jesus) and cannot fix your problems (sorry!). While pursuing my imperfect life, I have learned some simple, helpful practices to focus on what matters most to me in my day-to-day life.
A key practice is noting what I’m currently doing that is investing in those relationships and priorities that matter most to me.
Celebrating these wins has helped me move forward and make progress on bigger goals. I hope this can help, you, too!
You can live intentionally with passion and purpose as God’s beloved.
In this post, we’ll evaluate how you’re focusing on your priorities.
Think of this as your “celebrate the wins” activity. We’ll highlight how you’re currently rocking out in your life. Woohoo!
In the first post, we’ve discussed how to figure out what matters most to you. A key tool we used throughout this post was the Relationships and Priorities Worksheet.
Take a few minutes to grab the handy worksheet by popping your email address below. It should come to your inbox in a few minutes!
Your Relationships and Priorities worksheet should be filled out with the following:
Now you’re ready for the next step – evaluating how you are (or are not) focusing on these key relationships and priorities.
Taking 10-30 minutes to note where you are now will be a game-changer to live more intentionally.
The good news? You’re probably already focusing on these areas of your life more than you realize!
The bad news? You’re also likely not setting yourself up for success as much as you may assume you are. (That’s for another post!)
What the what?!
I know, it’s complicated.
This exercise is not intended to make you feel guilty or less-than. You’re just noting the tangible ways that you are prioritizing what matters to you.
That’s it.
Please don’t beat yourself up for all the things you “ought to,” “should to,” or “meant to do.”
I have great respect for the past. If you don’t know where you’ve come from, you don’t know where you’re going. I have respect for the past, but I’m a person of the moment. I’m here, and I do my best to be completely centered at the place I’m at, then I go forward to the next place.
Maya Angelou
Same thing here.
If you need to, imagine that you’re pulling all those icky-guilt-inducing feelings out and setting them in a box. Put the box aside where you can’t see them and dive in. Those feelings aren’t serving you or helping you live more intentionally.
Rather than dwelling on what you’re NOT doing well, note what you’ve been doing that has been an investment in those key relationships and priorities.
That’s way more fun than self-flagellation, right?
I’ve really struggled with how to emphasize that this is NOT about legalism.
This is not about checking boxes to see what you’re doing to earn love, glory, rewards, or whatever.
It’s really not.
Relationships and priorities require your investment in order for them to grow. You can’t control others and your circumstances, but you can influence them.
How we spend our days is of course how we spend our lives. What we do with this hour and that one is what we are doing.
Annie Dillard, The Writing Life
That’s what this exercise is all about – paying attention to how you’re directing your time and energy.
Don’t worry about jotting down what you want to do or think you ought to do. Just focus on what you’re actively doing now.
Just a warning: your worksheet may explode with writing now! Feel free to grab more paper if that will help you get more space to process your thoughts.
As you look at your recorded relationships and priorities, jot down the ways that you are currently focusing on them.
Let’s say that one of your most important relationships is spouse or significant other. What are some ways that you are currently investing in this relationship?
You might say:
That’s it. Easy-peasy, right?
Did other things come up that you totally forgot about?
For instance, my husband and I text each other periodically throughout the day. We’re not wordy or complicated. (I really don’t want to text him about what I ate for lunch.) We text a “good morning kick-off-I-love-you” text. The rest of the day is scattered with silly emojis. It’s a treat, not a burden.
That has been a small (insanely easy) thing that helped us grow our relationship.
Let’s do the same for each of the relationships and priorities you’ve jotted down.
Ditto with the above.
Rinse and repeat.
Woohoo! You did it! You identified what you’re actively doing to invest in your relationships and priorities. Here’s what you’ll want to do:
Completing this step helped my husband and I see how we were currently investing our time and energy.
It was helpful to acknowledge what we were doing well before deciding what we could improve upon.
The next step is identifying how you’d like to grow these relationships and priorities. In the next post, we’ll identify the small, incremental tweaks you can make to live more intentionally.
You can live intentionally with passion and purpose as God’s beloved.
I’d love to hear from you – what are some things you’re doing to invest in those key relationships and priorities? Any wins you forgot to be proud about? Tell me about it in the comments!
P.S. Want some crazy simple steps to start living intentionally? Grab the Embrace Your Potential Playbook. It’ll help you zoom in on your God-gifted personality and give you practical tips to be more intentional, passionate, and purposeful as God’s beloved so you can become the best version of yourself.
I’m Cortney, a recovering over-achiever and God’s beloved who loves helping fellow Christian women like you embrace your God-given gifts so you have the confidence to live authentically.
I’m also a full-time mama to two sweet little boys, wife to my best friend, motivational speaker, and part-time Christian life coach. Chai lattes, strong coffee, podcasts, yoga, dance, and fairy tales nourish my soul and add sweetness to life.
Discovering the joy of embracing my God-given gifts and who He created me to be was a game-changer—a journey that brought freedom, unexpected delights, and relief from guilt. Finally, I felt free to be myself and ditch the pressure of being someone I wasn’t.
Incorporating those gifts into my day—from weekly planning to deciding on commitments, nurturing my marriage, and parenting—transformed everything. Now, I can’t imagine life without the perspective of fully embracing who God created me to be. I was missing so much without it!
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